When I was married and finally realized my spouse was never going to give the relationship its due; I made up my mind to be the wife I wanted to be. It didn't matter in real time, but in the long run, like right now, my being that way has made all the difference in the world.
When you love the wrong man, there is a lot of pain associated with it because usually they really do not know how to love back. They rarely are present even when they are and seldom want to deal with the day-to-day of the relationship.
It is clear they are truly in it for what they can get and not much more. So many do not listen to men when they are telling them point blank that they are not the marrying kind, or even fit for a long-term relationship. I was one of those women. I was so caught up in getting what I wanted until, (to be honest) what he wanted didn't matter much, because I knew best. At least that is what I told myself and that is why I ended up carrying the marriage for must of its duration.
He sat back and let me do all I wanted to. He let me be all I wanted to be. Why? Because I am a giver and he completely benefited from everything I produced. Who would stay for the door prizes?
Still, I decided I would see the thing through and I am glad I did. Now that it is over, I harbor no hard feelings. I am free to love without reservation and I am not bitter, but better for having a made up mind.
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